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In today's society, technology plays a significant role, and it's important for parents to navigate their children's screen time without completely cutting off their access to technology. Allowing children to explore and learn about technology is crucial for their future success in this technologically driven world. Initiatives like Internet for All highlight the importance of providing children with safe spaces and easy access to technology for educational and entertainment purposes. However, as parents, it's necessary to establish limits on screen time to ensure a healthy balance. This article will guide you on setting limits without sacrificing your child's enjoyment.
The Power of Technology and Video Games.
Video games and social media platforms have become prominent social tools in our society. An inspiring story about a young boy named Mats illustrates the positive aspects of gaming and technology. Mats a young disabled gamer who lived in Oslo caused his parents to worry because of how much time he spent online playing the game World of Warcraft (WoW). His parents thought he lived a lonely and isolated life. But, when Mats passed away, his parents discovered that he, in fact, knew people from all over Europe. Through video games, Mats was able to develop meaningful connections with people he had never met in real life. Some of his “online” friends organized funds and traveled from the UK, Denmark, and Finland to his funeral in Norway, and others all across Europe lit candles in his memory. Mats dad was very touched and said “We cried and cried from an intense emotional joy that came from seeing what kind of a life Mats had in fact lived. With real friends, sweethearts, and people who cared so much that they would fly from another country to the funeral service of someone they had never met. That was powerful."
What is screen time?
Screen time is a fuzzy concept. Before discussing how to limit screen time without ruining your child´s fun, let's clarify what screen time encompasses. Is it doing an assignment using Microsoft Word? Does it count when your child goes on the computer at school? How about when your child is watching something on a streaming service or playing video games? Screen time is defined as time spent watching television, playing a video game, or using an electronic device with a screen (such as a smartphone or tablet). It's important to note that not all screen time is created equal, as different activities can have varying effects on children's well-being.
Screen time can be divided into four types:
Social media - Websites and applications that enable users to create and share content to participate in social networking. Examples are Instagram, TikTok, Snapchat, and Facebook.
Television - A source of entertainment. It is a device that sends moving pictures and sounds from one place to another.
Video gaming - The action or practice of playing electronic games with other players online or by yourself.
Computer use - Usage of a computer to perform tasks such as gathering knowledge, casual internet browsing, and watching videos, to name a few.
These four types are popular modes of screen time among children and young adults. Research from 2019, looking at the effects of anxiety and depression, found that different types of screen time can affect individuals differently. In fact, playing video games was found to be the best usage of screen time and caused the least anxiety and depression. Social media was considered the worst screen time usage and significantly more likely to evoke anxiety and depression. Based on that alone, it can be deduced that video games are much better for children than social media. Video games can boost learning, enhance attention, increase intelligence, improve memory, and encourage creativity.
Different sources recommend different things
The internet is filled with varying advice on screen time limits, some sources say your child becomes somewhat of a monster if they have more than half an hour of screen time, while others are more flexible. The general consensus emphasizes moderation and maintaining control over screen usage. As Jamie Barlett discusses in his 2019 article, we should be in control of our actions, not the screen. Screen time is not necessarily bad if used in moderation and balanced with other activities. The amount of time in front of a screen is not necessarily the issue, but how we utilize the time.
For instance, a group of Icelandic parents created a refrigerator magnet guideline for their community, specifying recommended screen time limits based on age.
Children age two to five:
60 minutes of screen time.
Children age six to nine:
90 minutes of screen time.
Children ages 10 to 13:
120 minutes of screen time.
Children ages 14 to 16:
180 minutes of screen time.
These screen time suggestions were not quite in line with Iceland´s Directorate of Health suggestions. The Icelandic Directorate of Health suggested engaging children in discussions about screen time rather than enforcing specific limits. Here are a few suggestions from Iceland´s Directorate of Health:
Children age two to five:
Children aged two to five should have limited screen time.
There is no specific limit, but the screen should not be used as a babysitter or to calm the child.
The child needs to learn how to understand and control their feelings independently.
You should try to find games or videos in your native tongue and watch them with the child.
You should also lead by example and ensure the television is not constantly turned on.
Try to plan regular no-screen time activities with your child.
Children ages six to 12:
Try to encourage diverse usage of screen time and learning opportunities.
Show your child´s screen time need interest and discuss it with them positively.
Respect age restrictions on video games and social media platforms.
Teach your child to come to you if they are ever asked for personal information like their real name, telephone number, email, home address, password, school, or even personal photos.
Ensure there are no screens during family time, such as at the dinner table.
Try to ensure that your children get enough sleep. Children between ages six and 12 need around 10 hours of sleep, and it is recommended that you encourage no screens in the child´s bedroom.
Children ages 13 to 18:
Good communication is crucial, and you ask your child how they feel about screen time and how they would want the rules to be. Involving your child in these decisions is a good way to go about screen time limits and habits.
Each family should devise their own screen time and find a good balance.
You, as parents, are the role models and need to set a good example when it comes to screen time.
Children at this age need plenty of sleep, and you must help ensure that screen time does not negatively affect their sleep or other basic needs like exercise or nutrition.
Effective Strategies for Limiting Screen Time.
We at the ECA highly recommend a couple of ways to help your child balance their screen time, consider these approaches:
Find activities away from the screen: Transform quality time into screen time by engaging in activities together.
Discover other interests: Understand your child's hobbies, sports, or topics they want to explore and plan enjoyable non-screen activities around them.
Encourage open communication: Foster a healthy dialogue about screen time, addressing your child's needs, motivations, and experiences. Use this conversation to gain insights into their gaming habits and social interactions.
Get involved and set prior limits: Show genuine interest in your child's digital world, helping them set boundaries and goals. Participate in activities like puzzle-solving, video editing tutorials, or learning about new subjects together. And establish screen time limits in advance to avoid interrupting your child's gaming sessions abruptly, which can lead to frustration or negative behavior.
Find activities away from the screen.
The default way to connect with others is most likely on social media. When you were younger, meeting friends in person was the default way. It is important to help your child find other ways to connect with their friends outside of social media or gaming. It is so easy to submit to the fact that computers and screens are a very easy and accessible way to occupy your time. It is way too easy to get sucked into an endless scroll on Instagram or TikTok versus phoning your friend to plan a meet-up, even though it might be even more enjoyable. Overall, if we look at it objectively, it is more of an effort to phone your friend, find a time that works for everyone, make your way to the designated meet-up spot, and hang out rather than chatting or playing together online in your own homes. It is important for you to find ways to help and encourage your child to create opportunities and situations where they can do something without using a screen.
Discover other interests.
A few tips to help your child find alternative activities to screens are to find out what your child is interested in. Are they interested in any sports? Do they like doing activities outside? Is there something that they want to learn more about? You can then leverage those insights into figuring out fun things to do together. You can even do this using computers, phones, or tablets. We strongly discourage sitting side by side scrolling through Instagram or TikTok as that sets a bad example. However, you can set up a screen time where you spend it together solving puzzles, teaching your child how to edit a video by watching a tutorial and experiment, learning about artificial intelligence, or even photoshopping some images.
Encourage open communication.
A crucial part of setting limits on screen time is a good relationship and a good information flow between the child and the parent/parents. It can be beneficial to have frequent conversations with your child about why they seek screen time and what they experience through screen time. Do they seek screen time because they are feeling sad or bored? Or are they seeking screen time to seek knowledge or become more skilled at something specific, like a particular game or academic subject? Through this type of conversation, you can learn multiple things about your child´s gaming habits and why they crave to spend much of their time in front of a screen, whether on their phone, television, tablet, or computer. Screens are a big social tool, especially video games, and you can gain a lot of insight by observing your child play and communicate online.
Get involved and set prior limits.
The more you as a parent are involved and show interest in your child´s digital world, the more you can help them set boundaries and goals around screen time. Some children have social anxiety if they are in large groups of people, but while playing video games, they have the freedom to learn and make mistakes. Setting up a framework around the child´s screen time can be useful. To make screen time limits easier to agree to and adhere to, is critical to set the screen time beforehand. If you do not set the screen time in advance, you will likely interrupt your child while he is zoned out in his games, causing a disruption that can understandably negatively affect their behavior. If you disrupt your child´s gaming session without any notice or predecided time limit, you prevent them from finishing their action or goal, causing irritation, frustration, and even anger. As mentioned in a previous ECA article that discusses ways to help support your child´s gaming passion, when your child has set their mind to something and someone gets in the way of their goal, they are more likely to react negatively to that kind of intervention. Thus good communication and predetermined time frames regarding screen time are a good foundation for setting limits.
As parents, we are responsible for guiding our children's screen time and ensuring a healthy balance. By setting limits and fostering open communication, we can help them enjoy technology's benefits while engaging in offline activities. Remember, it's never too late to strengthen your relationship with your child and support their healthy screen habits.